This past week was a little more difficult. Thanksgiving Day certainly was different than any other holiday observance. There were a few visitors and phone calls, but mostly, the day was quiet - quieter than usual since several of the residents were gone to be with their families.
The fact that it was a holiday week gave place to thinking about all of the changes that have occurred this year -- and those yet to come.
Of course, Thanksgiving marks the beginning of the 'Holiday Season'. That, in itself, is hard to process. I can't make plans. At this stage of life, there isn't even a small degree of what can be 'reasonably expected'. The best I can do is to formulate a few vague 'If / Then' scenarios.
Last week, Trent's wedding ring would no longer stay on his finger. I asked him if he wanted me to wrap it with tape so it would stay on. He handed it back to me and told me he didn't need it. I had tried to mentally prepare myself for the fact that I would need to remove his ring at some point, but I was totally unprepared for him to hand it back to me. It was hard.
Yesterday, there was a marked increase in Trent's level of fatigue and weakness.
I think one of the hardest things I deal with is not knowing exactly where we are in this journey. It requires me to continually surrender myself to the timeline that God has for us.
I've said it before, but it bears repeating: The greatest comfort through all of the uncertainties that we have been through has been knowing, without a doubt, that God is in control and that He has a plan for our lives and that He loves us and will work His plan in His time. Daily we see God's goodness to us. He continues to provide for our needs and shows us His love through those who He has placed in our lives.
We appreciate your prayers for us as we continue our journey.