- It feels like everyone has forgotten me.
- It feels like I am so very alone.
- It feels like I don't matter.
- It feels like there is judgements from too many sources.
- It feels like I will never succeed at this single-parent thing.
- It feels like the tears will never end.
- It feels like the pressure from it all will surely make my head literally explode.
And then . . .
The Holy Spirit gently touches my heart. I'm reminded of previous days when the feelings were so very intense and of how I made it through those days.
It is certain I didn't survive on feelings! I was able to walk through those days by forcing myself to focus on the things that I know.
- I may feel forgotten and alone, but I know God is always with me and He has not forgotten me and He has a purpose for this path on which He has placed me. ( ". . .I will never leave thee nor forsake thee." Heb. 13:5 )
- I may feel judgement (and it may honestly be there), but I know that I only answer to the few individuals to whom I've made myself accountable and ultimately to God Himself. ( "So then, everyone of us shall give an account of himself to God" Rom. 14:12 )
- I may feel that the tears will never end, but I know that God sees my tears and that He promises joy. ( " . . . weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." Ps. 30:5 )
- I may feel that the pressure is just too great, but I know God's strength is available to me if I choose to accept it. ( "And He said unto me, '. . . My strength is made perfect in weakness.' " II Cor.12:9)
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God created mankind with feelings, but those feelings were not to be the driving force in life. I must choose to live by what is constant - by what I know.
That day, I took each of those areas where it feels, and I acknowledged before God the truth of what I know.
This process is emotionally and mentally exhausting. I was left feeling spent, and my eyes still burned from the tears that had been shed. But the reward for the effort was there -- the weight was lifted, and I was at peace.
